On Top

So this is my goal, starting today: (since I have not been working at the hub, (my only full time job) I have been slacking off in everything else, but not anymore) first off, I'm going to get on top of things. I am going to eat right, that shouldnt be too hard once I have the beloved hub back. I am also going to work on the book and work on reading my friends book. Along with that I am going to be more viligent on the forum and also less on world of warcraft, the bain of a productive mans life.

Next thing. I am going to try to date more... maybe. I dont care, I just want to get some more ladies in my life, I'm kinda ladieless now XD haha.

In other news: Christmas just ended, new years is ahead. Not that new years is really different from any other day lol. Just get to eat snacks till midnight instead of play video games till midnight. There is other news, but I wouldnt say at this point it should be made public, so thats it, thanks for reading everyone and have a super night.

People :(

I think people are sick of me lately, they are tired of being around me and when they are they are very on edge. If you are not liking how I am, I don't want to change it, sorry, its just who I am. If you don't want to be around me, don't go out of your way to act like you like me or care about me. Okay? Okay. Cool. Now that that is over....

I just want to say thank you to all those who like me for who I am. I appreciate you back. :) Next: I really appreciate those that bear with me through my dumb moments. That is always nice (Barbara is prolly the most prime example of that :P).

Moving on, I have three jobs right now, one of which I don't have to do cause it is the holidays, thank God. but soon after I'm going to be as busy as I'll get out. I think its going to be nice to not have time to think about things and how they are mulling over. I prefer thinking on the bright side to be honest. I'm just kinda pissed right now. Bah! I wish people would just..... let me be, you know? I'm tired of being pulled in every which direction to do every sort of thing: "Every hates you cause of this!" "Everyone hates you cause of that!" Well please, just stop fucking hating me okay, I can't please every God Damned person so get over yourself.

Its kind ironic how the people I spend the most time with are the very same people who feel picked on cause they think I don't spend any time at all with them. Its also ironic the people who I do the most for are the same people who feel like I do nothing for them. I'm tired of it. And I don't want to talk about it cause they are also the same people who will turn me into the bad guy in the situation. GOD! IT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF WHEN PEOPLE TURN ME INTO THE BAD GUY! STOP FUCKING TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY FUCKING GUILTY CONSCIENCE DAMN IT!

i need to calm down, i'm tired, and i just had a dumb argument with a friend, i just need to vent for a minute. geeze, there's not really anyone to talk to anymore. I've got my nerd friends, but they are not too good at being vented to, i've got austin but i haven't seen him for a milenia. everyone else is just too sick of me to hear it. blegh. goodnight

Remember?

Do remember when we were just happy? So carefree, we did what we wanted to do when we wanted to do it. Remember, it was right after we made up, life was so ... blissful then, now its all just bland, not depressing or sad, just bland. I dont know about you, but I want that back. When we could just be together, we didnt have to do anything or think, just talk or goof off, or we could just sit in silence. We could kiss when we wanted, and we could not kiss when we didnt want to. No obligation, but no restriction, just freedom, just simple pleasurable life. Easy, fun, happy.

Oh how I wish.

Plague

Well, its been thanksgiving week, and its been great, and very un-busy. I have been sick with a terrible cough for three weeks now, and this last week it was the worst, I took work off all week. Well, I think its better. Thanksgiving was fun, I had reletives over none of which seemed to want their picture taken.... and I had a D&D sleepover, that was tons of fun. Played WoW the rest of the time.

Opposite

Its starting to really piss me off. The opposite of everything that I want always seems to happen at certain points of my life. And if something that I want happens, it either happens in the wrong way, the wrong time, or biting me in the ass later.

In lighter news I'm taking all of next week off at the disco, I applied for the supervisor position and apparently rate is more important than anything else in the world there. So.... as much as I'd hate to be, I'm pretty pissed off, and I need some time to relax and get over it. It erks me that someone can be pulling complete bull shit and get surveys, when I follow the god fucking damn rules and I don't get shit from it. It pisses me off.

In other light news, one of my best friends is going to be working with me at my other job (the food court one) ^_^ and I got paid, so I think I am going to buy new cloths.

Speaking of new clothes I patched up my shoes! :D I'm so proud of them. :)

Anywho, that's it, rant from bad to good, now things are going better.

football

Yes, I, the king of nerds, Jeremy, played football. it was so much a choice of my own as a sacrifice I am willing to make to help a friend out. One of my friends is on a football team... he has never played football before though, so he asked us very kindly to play with him. And we did, and now I am sore. Half way through though I was a wuse and pulled out the Cammy. ^_^ I got some good shots, I think I am going to my friends games to take pictures.

Ahh... my friend, once a nerd, now a jock.

And my other friend, always a nerd, even while looking dumb with a football.

And a good tackle.

Looks forlorn, as if he is praying, this would make a good inspirational message picture.

And who says a good photo needs to be in focus. How I wish this was in focus.

Like this!

Awe, the twins are fighting again. (not twins, they just managed to dress the same.)

Throwing a football, in focus, brilliant.

Have a super day!

Blegh

So.... tired these days, not to mention a little disgruntled. Love is screwed up. It works, but its weird. I'm not saying anything bad has happened. I'm just getting sick of waiting, oh well. :) other than that I am doing super great.... and tired.... and sick. lol! ok, really I have something to complain about, but really I am happy and I want to keep it that way! Yay!

I went to coffee again tonight, I didnt get coffee, neither did she, but it was still way fun. The girl that was closing was way fun. I think she was way cute and way funny. Lol! I like the girl I went to coffee with better though :). Too bad she has a boyfriend. :/ Well anywho, small update. Have a super day my lovely readers.

Move On

I have searched long and hard for a girl to fit my dreams. When I found her I thought myself to be in love only to be stopped by something I did not understand, just a road block on the way to love. I was not in love with her, I had no reason to not be aside from the fact I did not feel like I was in love.

Then I found the person that filled in the gaps, not necessarily my juvinile dream girl. Not exactly the girl I dreamed of, but the girl that I currently dream of. The girl that I never get boared around, the girl that I can never stay angry at and never stays angry at me. The girl whos name worms its way into every conversation I have, the girl that I am always wanting to be spending time with but too afraid to call, the girl that I never know what to do around but I always feel comftorble. Now it feels as though finally she is slipping through my fingers, its been hard enough to hold onto her for this long. I love her, but at long last I think I really going to start looking again. I want to wait, but I need to move on. I love her, but what is the point if I'll never have her? :/ Its a work in progress, I dont exactly know what is going on, she never really tells me, I have been willing to wait. I dont know. I'm just ....afraid. I cant get her out of my head, no other girl seems to be able to hold a candle to her, not even the girl that I thought was absolutely perfect. Its not that she is better than any of these other girls, its that I guess I feel like she is better for me. But like I said, maybe it is time I start really trying, because I'm not going anywhere with her, I feel like I keep getting closer, but the rainbow that she is its really impossible to actually reach her.

In other news, I have discoverd A.F.I. I love them. I am now going to be working around 60 hours a week. I have calculated that I will prolly have three hours of free time in the evening, and that is what my days will consist of until the weekend.

I still think you should dump him for me, if you dont I'm happy for you and hope things work out for you. I love you.

Date

Yes, I went on the date, and it was much better than I could have asked for. Thankfully the girl that I took was in good humor and took my side comments from my one track mind about another girl. Yes, no tact, what can I say?

The other two friends seemed to be getting along quite well. I'm excited. My favorite comment went something like this, "this is where you put your arm around me." She requires him to be the man, but is willing to be the one with initive. Hahahaha. Well its late now, I'm excited for coffee tomarrow with my older friends and the girl I like..... a lot.... right now.

Anywho, 'night!

New Blog

Well, I decided that my previous blog was a little dark for my more recent posts, all around I have been much more happy. It seems as though everything is going my way so why not do a little bit of celebrating by creating a new blog! I hope you all like my new format.

Anywho, my life is busy of course, I took work off today so I didn't get to see her. :/ oh well, hahaha! On the other hand I went to an awkward party, it was sort of fun, but also at the same time I guess I dont work well in large groups. Well, I guess that is all the news for today, I have a date tomarrow, but I am just going because one of my friends asked out another and I've been bugging them to ask eachother out for sometime, and well, she wanted me to find a date and group with them. How can I say no to that? I'll give some updatage later.

Your friend,

Jeremy